I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
