your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
You may now shotgun with the bride
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
