end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I hope mine doesn't look like that
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
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