Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
