'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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