He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
