I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
