Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Randomize
