Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
