I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize