I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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