That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize
