well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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