you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
