please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
