Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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