New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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