You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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