i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
