i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Randomize