im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
