I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
