A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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