I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Randomize
