I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
