In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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