how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
