The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Randomize
