Kareoke will never be a sober sport
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
My pussy is not your playground.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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