I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I am available for nakedness
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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