Old men and throwing up are my life now.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
