you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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