He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
