This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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