didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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