you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
