So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
