You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
