it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
