Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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