Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
