two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
ttyl tear gas
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
