i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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