If i come over, it means nothing
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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