3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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