We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
