I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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