My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Randomize
