That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
