dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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